The Patrick Star Show/Season 1

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SpongeBob SquarePants: Seasons: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 | Movies: The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie / Sponge Out of Water / Sponge on the Run / Saving Bikini Bottom: The Sandy Cheeks Movie / Plankton: The Movie / Search for SquarePants | Spin-offs: Kamp Koral (s1, s2) / The Patrick Star Show (s1, s2, s3, s4, s5, s6, s7) | Specials: SpongeBob's Big Birthday Blowout, The Tidal Zone, Kreepaway Kamp, Snow Yellow, Sandy's Country Christmas, SpongeBob and Patrick's Timeline Twist-Up

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The Patrick Star Show is an American animated television series and a spinoff of SpongeBob SquarePants. The show features Patrick Star and his family hosting a talk show.

Episode 1

Late for Breakfast [1.1a]

Plankton: Chum. It's versatile. You can spread it on toast. Hah-hah! Aw. It also keeps you warm on frosty winter nights. Mmm, cozy. The smell keeps out the cold. Here at the Chum Bucket, chum comes in three delicious varieties. Moist, soggy, and pumpkin spice.

Bummer Jobs [1.1b]

Patrick: Hi, SpongeBob. Fancy meeting you here. [restrained chuckle]

SpongeBob: Hi, Patrick. Trying out a new look? [gets the tie off Patrick, and the latter inhales deeply]

Patrick: Yeah, I'm looking for a job.

SpongeBob: Oh, what a coincidence. I could also use a job. [Popeye impression] Myeh, 'cause I'm a little low on lettuce and I need some scratch for spatulas, see?

Patrick: It's not a coincidence, SpongeBob. It's just two similar things happening at the same time.

Episode 6

Gas Station Vacation [1.6a]

[A fat, shirtless guy is sleeping on the beach. Rube's head pops out of the sand.]

Rube: [grunting] Don't you wish you were here? [Cut to Rube standing in front of some double doors.]

Rube: Then take a trip, you silly, to Frigate Frolic, [zooms out to show a place themed like a sinking ship] Bikini Bottom's fab family fun park and resort. [cut to Rube surfing] You can ride the waves [cut to Rube being lifted by a whale fountain] or blast off at Beluga Blast, [cut to Rube playing pool] shoot some pool, [cut to Rube jumping off a diving board into a pool] or jump in one. [cut to Rube in a dining area where foods are served on hooks] Whether you're hungry for the buffet at the Taj Marlin [cut to Rube holding a towel next to two old people on the beach] or you just want to sunbathe, [throws towel to cover an old lady] we got you covered. [she slaps him] Ow! [cut to Rube holding a sign in front of the building] So meet me at the amazing Frigate Folic! I'll be waitin'!

[Cut to a "Brought to You By Gas Land" slide.]

Announcer: Brought to you by the gas you won't want to pass. [fart sound effects] Gas Land!

---

[Cut to hot dogs cooking on a roller. Patrick grabs two. Squidina is drinking a slushie with her arms full of snacks.]

Patrick: Check it, Sis! [ties hot dogs into a dog shape] A sea poodle! [laughs, then burns his hand] Ahh! Oh-oh-oh-oh! Ow! Ow! [runs through shelves] Ooh! Ooh! Ahh!

[Patrick walks up to a kid with an ice cream cone. He dunks his hand inside and sighs in relief.]

Kid: Huh?

Patrick: Ooh! [eats ice cream off his hand, Kid starts crying and runs away. Huh? I'll make us a family sized vacation feast. [chuckles and Patrick grabs some bags of snacks from the shelves. He shoves them into the microwave, along with some slushies and drinks. He closes it, elbows it shut, and sets the timer, then walks away. The kid that Patrick took the ice cream from is talking to the manager.]

Kid: [sadly] And then he ate it! [points to Patrick] There he is! [whimpering]

Patrick: Excuse me, sir, you can't come in here [points to the kid] ruining customer's ice cream cones! [waves finger] That's our policy!

[Patrick looks at the manager's outfit.]

Patrick: [puts hands on head] Whaaa!? [grabs him and runs over the kid] Sis, get a picture of me with the Gas Land mascot!

Squidina: All right, Stars, photo op! [the family members come in] Say cheese poofs!

Patrick, Bunny, Cecil, and GrandPat: Cheese poofs!

---

[The manager puts some garbage bags into a dumpster. He turns around.]

Manager: Whaaa!? [He sees the worms rampaging and attacking people around the gas station.] What's happening!?

[woman with a worm on her tongue shows up and screams.]

Fred [removes a worm from his face, with golf balls in his eyes, pointing] They did it! [The Stars climb to the top of the mountain with pickaxes. They watch the sunrise.]

Bunny: What a beautiful vacation sunset. [The Stars sighing]

[The manager gets angry, bites a squeegee between his teeth, and climbs up the mountain. He appears before the Stars with redeyes.]

Cecil: [casually] Hey, Mr. Mascot, come to enjoy the sunset with us?

Manager: I want you troublemakers out of my station immediately [intense close-up, he wipes his eyes away with the squeegee] or I will squeegee your faces off. That's our policy. [cackles]

Stars: [unsure] Uh... [cheering] Yay! [laughing]

Cecil: Do my eyes next!

Bunny the Barbarian [1.6b]

[The episode begins with an open shot of the Star family house, where a horn is being blown. Zoom and cut to the inside of the house, where it is revealed that Bunny is blowing a conch shell.]

Bunny: [blowing conch horn] Star family assemble! [Several family members travel through a large system of pipes.]

Squidina: Whee! D'oh! [runs to Bunny]

GrandPat: [on scooter, crashes from above floor] Ugh!

Cecil: [gets out of painting, runs to Bunny] Oh! [chuckles]

[Patrick, in a robe outfit, steps out of a stage door, with pararazzi behind him. Patrick tries to shut the door, but the paparazzi takes his robe outfit. Patrick manages to shut the door and walks off. Patrick taking his sunglasses off, humming, Patrick and Cecil arrive at the scene.]

Bunny: As you know, tonight is family movie night! [Patrick, Squidina, Cecil, and GrandPat cheer] But first, we all have to do our weekly household chores. [Everyone else looks disappointed.]

GrandPat: Wait, what?

---

Female barbarian: [turns around] Huh?

Bunny: How much does it cost to get in?

Female barbarian: It could cost you your life. What manner of armor are you wearing?

Bunny: Oh, this old thing? It's just something I threw together. [Female barbarian whistles, startling Bunny]

Bunny: [lizard roaring as it passes by her] Ooh! [gets hit by lizard] Oh, ow! Oh, ow! [lizard flies away, Bunny and the barbarian swap clothing]

Female barbarian: Ooh, this armor is so soft and breathable! [spins around] I feel so light!

Bunny: And it's 100% machine-washable. [Female barbarian giggling, dancing] Aren't you going in?

Female barbarian: I was gonna steal the [points ahead] bejeweled treasure from the Dust Demon inside, but now I just wanna [dances away] dance and dance and dance! [laughs]

Bunny: Bejeweled treasure? [gasps] Adventure! [walks up ahead]

Gatekeeper: [in door, Pat the Hapless approaches as well] Next! Who or what are you to think you can enter this realm?

Pat the Hapless: Hm? Animal or mineral?

Gatekeeper: Wrong.

Pat the Hapless: [floor drops below him as he falls into pit of fire] Ah!

Gatekeeper: [Bunny approaches, pointing to her] Who or what are you to think you can enter this realm?

Bunny: My name is Bunny Star, and I'm from Bikini Bottom. I work as a greeter at a local prison, but if I was to say what I am most proudest of, that would be being a mother.

Gatekeeper: A mother? [whimpering, sniffles] I never had a mother. I was conjured from [cow moos] sea cow pies by an evil spirit. [slams trapdoor, opens door as Bunny enters] May I call you "mum"?

Bunny: Aww. [kisses gatekeeper on forehead] Mwah! [begins climbing spiral staircase]

Gatekeeper': Beware of the [points] Dust Demon's spawn, mother.

Episode 7

Who's a Big Boy? [1.7b]

SpongeBob: I'm ready! I'm ready! I'm ready! I'm ready! Ready to work at the Krusty Krab, but first...

Patrick: SPONGE SMASH!

Terror in 20,000 Leagues [1.8]

Note:This Halloween Special Is Focused on the Show

[The episode begins at night in Bikini Bottom, with several kids trick-or-treating.]

Female trick-or-treater: Candy! [laughs]

Kid in monster costume: [comes up to screen] Trick or treat! [laughs and runs off]

[Pinkeye jumps by in a vampire costume and hisses. Ouchie, in a garlic costume, barks and chases him away. Old Man Walker is dressed as a mad scientist, laughs, and swallows the screen. We see the inside of the Star house, covered in Halloween decorations. Cecil, dressed as a werewolf, comes out from behind the couch.]

Cecil: [meows] Wait, is that right?

GrandPat: [rides past covered in toilet paper] I think we're out of toilet paper!

[A fishing rod with Bunny's hair, glasses, and shirt floats by.]

Bunny: [ghostly] Ooh, I'm the invisible mom! [she is hiding around the hallway, exposing her tattoo] Oh, my! [hides]

[The camera goes into Patrick's room. Squidina is filming Patrick, who is sleeping.]

Squidina: Okay, Patrick. It's showtime! Up and at 'em!

[She pulls of the sheets to see Patrick asleep and drooling.]

Squidina: Oh my Neptune, he's dead! [lifts his eyelid to reveal static] Dead tired! [takes out candy bar] Ah! [snaps it] Hah!

[She waves the candy bar in front of Patrick's nose. Patrick sniffs it and sits up.]

Patrick: Mmm, nougat. Mmm.

Squidina: It's Halloween, Patrick! You know what that means!

Patrick: Candy!

[Patrick reaches for the candy, but falls out of bed. He tries to lick it up, but the Dartfish Family, dressed in costumes, run and pick it up.]

Dartfish Family: Trick or treat! [run off]

---

[The camera zooms out to show Dr. Plankenstein watching it. Patrick screams. SpongeMonster and Patgor laugh. One of Patgor's pieces of popcorn gets stuck in Plankenstein's eye.]

Plankenstein: Huh? Ugh. [growls and slaps Patgor] What is wrong with you?

Patgor: [scratching head, making skin flakes fall off] Dry, itchy scalp?

Plankenstein: [as flakes fall on him] What? Ugh! No! [bursts out of pile] Can't you two see that this "Halloween" thing is all a ruse?

SpongeMonster: Oh, I like to stop and smell the ruses.

Plankenstein: Of course you do. [muttering] Last time I buy day-old brains. [gesturing to TV] Look, the candy, the costumes, the happy children! All lies!

Patgor: [worried] Say it isn't so, master.

Plankenstein: I shan't. Instead, I'll tell you about the spine-tingling terror that is the real Halloween!

[SpongeMonster and Patgor hug each other and shiver.]

Plankenstein: Ooh, Halloween is a terrible night. [lightning flashes] Disguised villagers lurk around every corner, waiting for their chance to destroy my work, ravage my lab, and use my bathroom without lighting a match!

SpongeMonster: [glances at Patgor] Uh...

Patgor: Huh?

Plankenstein: [pauses] And they take your candy!

SpongeMonster: No!

SpongeMonster and Patgor: Not our candy! [crying]

Plankenstein: Yes, now you see. If we're going to survive the night, [gestures to Patrick and Squidina on TV] we shouldn't be dulling our wits with droll drivel. We should be sharpening our senses with something scary! [takes out TV remote] Prepare yourselves for horrors more terrible than even your darkest nightmares, for Halloween is upon us! [laughs]

SpongeMonster: Please, no!

[Plankenstein presses the button to show footage of puppies.]

Plankenstein: Wha? Oops, sorry. Wrong channel.

[He hits the button again. Plankenstein laughs as the TV show goes to showing a village. Granny Tentacles' arm splashes a can on it, forming text that reads "Granny Tentacles' Pantry of Doom."]

Deep-voiced narrator: Granny Tentacles' Pantry of Doom!

[Granny Tentacles, as a witch, steps outside of her house and picks up her newspaper.]

Granny Tentacles: Oh my, what a beautiful view... if you don't mind rundown eyesores. [shuts door and cans fall onto her, off a shelf] Oh! That's it! My house is a mess! I can't live like this anymore! [one last can hits her] A little hard work and elbow grease will get my home ship shape. Now I just gotta find a sucker to do it for me. [Bunny is humming happily] Huh? [opens window]

[Bunny is handpainting her clothes on a clothesline.]

Bunny: ♪ A doo, doo, doo, rhymes with blue! ♪ [laughs]

[Granny Tentacles laughs and runs to her cabinet. She picks out a bunch of ingredients and pours them into a cauldron. A smoke beast comes out, and she stirs it. When Bunny is done painting, Granny Tentacles comes up to her.]

Granny Tentacles: Morning, Bunny. How goes the laundry?

Bunny: Good! I'm just doing the second coat now! [paints coat]

Granny Tentacles: [ominously] That's great.

[Granny Tentacles takes out a cookie shaped like Bunny and shoves a pretzel stick into it, sending out a purple beam of magic that hypnotizes Bunny.]

Granny Tentacles: Now mow my lawn!

[A hypnotized Bunny walks around and grazes the grass outside Granny Tentacles' home. Granny Tentacles takes out a cookie of Bubble Bass.]

Granny Tentacles: I hope you do windows!

[She hypnotizes Bubble Bass, who is pushing a cart. He goes to the walls of Granny Tentacles' house and licks a stain off them, exposing a window. Granny Tentacles hypnotizes Squidina, Cecil, a fish, and Larry. All of them are doing her chores. Larry brings some wood into the house. Squidina goes under Granny Tentacles' bed and comes out covered in dust. Riding on Cecil, Granny Tentacles manipulates the cookies to move everyone. However, she quickly grows tired of moving all of them.]

Granny Tentacles: Phew! It's hard work getting other people to do your hard work! My tentacles are killing me! Phew!

[She lifts up her tentacle, which turns red and gasps weakly. She sees Patrick outside, struggling to open a bag of chips.]

Granny Tentacles: Oh, Patrick? Would you be a dear and rub my tootsies? Not like you got a choice! [laughs]

[She sticks the pretzel into the Patrick cookie, firing a beam. The beam bounces around Patrick's empty, brainless head and launches back at Granny Tentacles' voodoo doll. It comes to life and bites her arm at the same time Patrick bites the chip bag.]

Granny Tentacles: My curse has been reversed! I guess to control your mind, you need a mind to control!

[The Patrick cookie runs after her. She throws things at it, but it surfaces from the pile and throws a book at her. She throws a drumstick, which it throws back. It throws more items at her, ending in a cauldron, which she peeks out of. She grabs Larry and uses him as a shield. Outside, Patrick is also throwing random things. Granny Tentacles runs and tries throwing another fish at the cookie, although it dodges. It growls and rummages through her pantry.]

Granny Tentacles: Oh! No, no, please! Not that! Not a [the cookie holds up a spoon] --a spoon? Well, that's just stupid. [the cookie throws it away and holds up a banana] A banana? That's even lamer. [takes out an axe] There! Now that's scary! [the cookie wields it] No, not an axe! Stay away!

[The cookie throws the axe, which Patrick catches.]

Patrick: Ooh, cookie! [drops the axe, almost hitting her, and eats it] Thanks, Granny Tentacles. Got anymore? [opens pantry and sees cookie] Huh? Ooh.

Granny Tentacles: No! You stay out of my pantry! [Patrick eats them] My food-oo dolls!

[Scooter is unhypnotized after Patrick eats his cookie.]

Scooter: Huh? [sees broom, angry] Hey!

[Patrick eats Bunny's cookie. Outside, she stops eating grass, and spits out a giant clump of it. Patrick eats the entire rest of the cookies at once, snapping everyone out of their hypnosis. The angry townsfolk approach Granny Tentacles.]

Granny Tentacles: [nervously] Hey, hey. [chuckles and takes prune juice] Prune juice, anyone? It's got extra fiber.

[Squidina comes to the front and takes out a cookie of Granny Tentacles. She sticks the pretzel wand into it, firing a beam. Granny Tentacles screams as the camera fades to black.]

---

[a restaurant that looks like a cowboy hat is shown. A zombie kicks the door open.]

Zed: Howdy, I'm Famous Zed, and if you're anything like me, you are hungry for brains! [head jumps onto a table] At Famous Zed's, we've got buckets of brains all for you! [head jumps on body] Enjoy brain eating at your own pace with a visit to our brain buffet.

[An old man sneezes on the sneeze guard, launching his head against it. His body collapses. A veiw Mr. Krabs, Mrs. Puff, Larry and everyone's heads removed]

Zed: Or order fresh brains right to your table!

[A zombie removes Fred's head and eats his brain.]

Fred: My brain!

Zed: So remember, the next time you've got a hankering that only brains can satisfy, mosey on down to Famous Zed's Brain Buffet! We'll have you eating brains faster than you can say--

Zed and zombies: Brains, brains, brains... [get up to camera]

---

Sci-fi announcer: Quasar The Movie: Dark Side of the Spoon! [A "Breakfast" sign lights up.]

Pat-Tron: Breakfast, breakfast! [comes in and trips over bags] Oh, boy! Breakfast time! [goes up to Quasar's sleeping pod and hits it rhythmically] Wake up, Captain Quasar! It's time for breakfast!

[The pod opens, and Pat-Tron continues pounding his fist, accidentally hitting Quasar a few times.]

Quasar: Stop! One of these days, Pat-Tron, I'm gonna sell you for scrap!

Pat-Tron: Not until after breakfast!

[Pat-Tron fries two eggs and ejects them from under his head.]

Quasar: Ooh!

[Pat-Tron's body rotates and shoots out two pieces of toast. Quasar shields himself, when they stop flying through the air and fall on his plate.]

Pat-Tron: Toast.

Quasar: Ooh! Huh?

[Pat-Tron takes Quasar's cup and turns around, then fills it as though he is peeing in it. Quasar stares in shock. Pat-Tron glances back at Quasar.]

Pat-Tron: [putting cup on table] Coffee, eggs and toast. Just the way you like it.

[Quasar nervously pushes the cup away with his knife. He eats the toast.]

Pat-Tron: [taking out cereal] And a bowl of Logic Loops for me!

[Pat-Tron pours cereal into a bowl and puts oil on it. He rips the top of the box off and dumps it all into his body, then dumps the bowl into his mouth, then eats the bowl whole. As he goes away, he starts groaning and short-circuiting.]

Quasar: Egad, Pat-Tron! What's the matter?

[Pat-Tron goes onto Quasar's table and starts flailing around.]

Pat-Tron: Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, oh! Ow, my robo tum-tum!

Quasar: [looking at box] What is in this garbage? Let's see, "Logic Loops. Free prize inside." [A crank comes out of Pat-Tron's body.]

Pat-Tron: Oh, what does this crank do? [turns it, and "Pop Goes the Weasel" plays softly]

Quasar: [still reading cereal box] Robo alien invader? [puts on glasses] "Warning: do not eat. May kill entire crew!" Pat-Tron, wait. Don't turn that--

[With a burst of confetti, a robot invader comes out of Pat-Tron's abdomen.]

Invader: [screeches] CGIGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

Pat-Tron: Ow!

[Quasar runs up to the invader, but is scared off by it spitting acid. It leaps out of Pat-Tron's body and scurries off, but Pat-Tron picks it back up.]

Pat-Tron: I'm a mommy! [hugs it and laughs]

[Pat-Tron puts a diaper, bonnet, and blanket around the invader.]

Quasar: That's not your baby, Pat-Tron. That's a murder machine!

Pat-Tron: Don't be silly. He's just a little hungry. Oh, I'll make him a bottle! Here! [gives wrapped invader to Quasar]

Quasar: Um, coochie coo?

[Quasar offers it a fork. It bites it and grows bigger, outgrowing the clothes and blanket Pat-Tron gave it. It snarls and chases after Quasar, catching up to him and jumping on his back.]

Quasar: [screams] ARRRRRRHHHHH!!!!!

Invader: [roars] ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOAGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!

Pat-Tron: [holding bottle] Now, now, baby. No biting the captain. [feeds bottle to invader] Here's baby's baba. [invader eats the bottle and grows] Time for burpies.

[Patrick burps the invader, and it spits up acid onto Quasar's suit.]

Quasar: Aah! Is that acid? [screams]

Pat-Tron: Oh, dear. I'll get a towel.

[Quasar sets the invader down. It roars at Quasar, and he screams. He runs away and throws a TV at it, which it eats. Pat-Tron comes in with a towel.]

Pat-Tron: Baby's first steps! Awww, look at him go! [records it with camera]

[The invader crashes into a console. Quasar slaps the camera out of Pat-Tron's hands and shakes him.]

Quasar: That's it! I'm done with your nonsense! Open the airlock! We're flushing that monster out into space!

[Quasar tries to hit an airlock button, but Pat-Tron interrupts him.]

Pat-Tron: My baby's not a monster! He's a growing boy! [green flash from off-screen] Look how big he's getting!

[The invader has grown massive, and it drools acid. Quasar nervously backs up against the door. The invader hits the airlock button. Quasar screams and is sent outside.]

Pat-Tron: Oh! My baby, you're safe. Now I can shower you with a mother's love. [hugs him, and gets eaten] Ow, ow, stop! I can't shower you if--ow! Why won't you let me love you?

[Quasar floats outside, disappointed.]

Quasar: I got to get a new robot.

---

Plankenstein: Huh? Those are some weird disguises for feudal villagers.

Patrick and Squidina: [dumb laughing] AHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

[The camera zooms into the candy that SpongeMonster is eating. Patrick and Squidina drool.]

Squidina: Okay, this is the last house in the neighborhood, and our last chance to get candy, so let's get it right!

Patrick: Right!

[They take a deep breath.]

Patrick and Squidina: [loudly] Trick or treat!

Plankenstein: Trick? Treat? Threaten me and demand a bribe, will you? Patgor, let 'er rip! [smashes door shut]

Patgor: Yes, master! [dumps oatmeal off castle, covering Patrick and Squidina]

Patrick: Me-flavored oatmeal! [bites self]

Squidina: Pull yourself together! We didn't come here for oatmeal! That candy will be ours!

---

Squidina: Come on. Where's that candy?

[Plankenstein is about to eat some of the candy. Squidina grabs him instead and looks at him.]

Squidina: Ooh, score! A jelly bean!

Patrick: Candy? Gimme!

[Patrick eats Plankenstein, who screams. Patrick sticks out his tongue and sees him, then screams. Squidina starts screaming. Their disguise falls on top of SpongeMonster, making them all scream. They crash and all fall out of the disguise. SpongeMonster holds Patrick and Squidina as Plankenstein drops out of the sky.]

Plankenstein: Good work, SpongeMonster. Now give those interlopers the ol' [making throwing gesture] heave-ho!

---

Patrick: I don't know, but I got us candy!

Squidina: Ooh, oh, boy! I'm gonna eat all the Nut Cracklers first! Ooh, or the Tropical Fruit Fuzzies! No, wait! The Cocoa Chunkers!

[She and Patrick eat the candy rapidly and enter the house. A realistic squid and starfish with angry expressions come out.]

'Squid and starfish": Trick or treat!

[Patrick and Squidina scream, dropping the candy behind and running away. The costumes open up to reveal Cecil as the squid and Bunny as the starfish.]

Bunny: Gosh, do you think we're doing this right?

Cecil: We must be. We've gotten candy from every kid tonight.

Bunny: Maybe we should save some for Patrick and Squidina?

[They pause for a moment.]

Cecil and Bunny: Nah! [laughing]

[They dive into the house and eat the candy.]

---

[in the ending of this episode]

Carolers: ♪ We wish you a merry Christmas, we wish you a merry Christmas, we wish you a merry Christmas... ♪

[The castle is already covered in snow.]

Plankenstein: [off-screen] Patgor, battle stations! Boil up a cauldron of eggnog!

Patgor: [off-screen] Yes, master.

[The text "MERRY CHRISTMAS" appears in red.]

French Narrator: Merry Christmas. [evil laugh]

Episode 11

X Marks the Pot [1.11a]

Man Ray: If I give you this, will you stay out of my way?

Patrick: Our basement is the darkest house in the room.

Patrick's Alley [1.11b]

Patrick: [to puppet] I think your magic word is broken! [as puppet] Argh! You moronic, imbecilic dimwit! [puppet punches him in the face multiple times, and he falls down, Patrick, now injured, puts the puppet in its box.]

Marcie: [shaking in box] Lemme outta here!

Patrick: What's the magic word? [Marcie's dolphin sounds are heard] Whoa!

GrandPat: Wow!

Patrick: That's not very kid friendly! Bad puppet!

---

[Towards the end of the episode, A robot is about to mow Squidina and Patrick]

Squidina and Patrick: Oh No, Robot Gardener Day!!! [both sob hysterically]

GrandPat: Welp, you know what they say "Into the frying pan and into the mower!" [Laughs as the episode ends]

Episode 12

Super Sitters [1.12b]

[When The Baby Bubble Eats SpongeBob's Comic Book While He is Drinking his Juice Box]

SpongeBob: Hey, This Was in mint Condition, or at least very good-slash-fine [All Babies Cry Together]

Patrick: Hey, Hey, Hey, Superheroes And Supervillians Don't Cry, They BATTLE! [Baby Ray Zaps Barnacle Bambino] Now You're Getting It, Baby Superhero Fight!

Episode 13

Nitwit Neighborhood News [1.13a]

Patrick: That guy must be a celebrity, he covered his face with a ski mask so he wouldn’t be noticed by pepperoni.

Squidina: You Mean "Paparazzi"?

Mid-Season Finale [1.13b]

Pearl: Hey, Squidina!

Squidina: [opening other painting] Yeah, Pearl?

Pearl: Can you keep a secret?

Squidina: [rubbing her hands together] Ooh, I sure can!

Pearl: Good! So can I!

[Pearl pulls on a zipper and zips her lips, and Squidina grumbles in frustration. They close the paintings. Sandy appears from under a rug on the floor.]

Sandy: [calling] Oh, Flying Dutchman?

[The Flying Dutchman appears from under another rug, holding a newspaper.]

Flying Dutchman: Yes, my dear?

Sandy: Why were you reading the obituaries this morning?

Flying Dutchman: Just checking to see who's single!

Sandy and the Flying Dutchman: Ha-cha-cha-cha-cha!

Episode 14

SpongeBob SquarePants Presents The Tidal Zone Part One - Shrinking Stars [1.14a]

GrandPat: [removes his VR goggles] Can't an old man play violent video games in peace anymore? Grr! [looks up] Water? [gets angry and goes to the bathroom while the rest of the family is still laughing]

Bunny: [as GrandPat approaches] We got shrunk!

Patrick: Hey, GrandPat!

Cecil: Can you get us some tiny towels?

FitzPatrick [1.14b]

Patrick: Two ice cream sundaes, Scoop Chucky! Extra large! And make it snappy! What are you gonna have, cuz?

FitzPatrick: Oh, nothing for me, thanks. I came for the music.

Rock T. Puss: Chocolate, vanilla, and strawberry, buttercream cone and black cherry, all of these flavors make me merry... when I'm eating ice cream!

Episode 15

Uncredible Journey [1.15a]

Patrick: Everybody come upstairs now!

Cecil: What's the hold up?

Bunny: Oh, no! What's wrong?

Squidina: Patrick, what is it?

[The Star Family gasp]

Patrick: He won't eat. He won't bark. He won't bite. Did he turn blue? Tinkle is--

Squidina: Dainty?

Bunny: Delightful?

Cecil: Decalcified?

Patrick: Dead!

[the family gasp in shock, they sigh while Bunny bursts into tears]

Bunny: [sobbing] AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

Host-a-Palooza [1.15b]

Patrick: Our next guest is a real frosty treat! Let's hear it for ice cream!

Ice cream cone guy: Thank you! Thank you! My wife just had a baby. Guess that now makes me a popsicle! [laughs]

Patrick: [laughs and then starts drooling]

Ice cream cone guy: Wait. Why? Why are you looking at me like that? [screams as Patrick eats the ice cream cone guy, ending the episode]

Episode 16

Backpay Payback [1.16a]

Squidward: La da dee, la da dum... [humming. He arrives at a house and rings the doorbell] Delivering the newspaper, ya-ta-ta-ta!

Cecil: Oh boy! A newspaper for me?

Squidward: Huh?

Cecil: Thanks, paper boy! [takes the newspaper]

Squidward: You still owe me cash! Ya-ta-ta-ta!

Cecil: I'll heard ya back! Ya-ta-ta-ta!

Squidward: [tries entering the Star Family house and cuts his two tentacles. He then tries to enter the window but cuts his left arm. He then tries entering the Star Family house again but cuts his two other tentacles] Aha. [Cecil opens a window so then Squidward would be able to enter and then gets his head cut off] Typical.

House Hunting [1.16b]

Jolly King Pork Chop: Well, Princess Hamhock! Enjoy the string haquanauts history?

Princess Hamhock: Yes, father! I just love singing gravy carols!

Jolly King Pork Chop: Only a sacrifice will appease the Pointy Mouth of Doom! Guards! [The guards take Sausage-Bard.]

Sausage-Bard: What? Where are you taking me?

Episode 17

The Drooling Fool [1.17a]

Rube: And, top it all off with the tastiest ride! -

Patrick: Whaa? Ohh! [perks up, looks behind him, and his eyes pop out as he sees the next ride]

Rube: The Baked Alaska! It's got every flavor known to man, man! It's all for you, Patrick. Patrick. Patrick. Patrick. Patrick.

Patrick: [looks above him, sweating and drooling in delight] Ohhhhhhhhh... [a close up painting is shown of the star ice cream dazed, but it turns out to be a dream]

Squidina: [walks into Patrick's room] Patrick? Patrick? Patrick! Wake up, Patrick, it's showtime! We've got a crowd today so - [looks below at the drool puddle] Huh, why is the floor wet? Oh, another ice cream dream..

Patrick's Got a Zoo Loose [1.17b]

Bunny: The toaster is working perfectly!

Patrick: Toaster, you are toast! [Patrick shoots the ray gun at the toaster and the toaster becomes the Enigma Shapeshifter.] Laser beam!

Bunny: Huh?

Episode 18

The Patterfly Effect [1.18b]

Patrick: Future Mom, you're meant for better things!

Bunny: Mom? What are you--

Patrick: [leaning over her] I'm your son! From the future! [electricity sparks on his body]

Bunny: Uh-huh. Like you could even prove such a thing.

Patrick: [leans in] Your favorite color... is purple.

Bunny: [surprised] Ooh!

Patrick: Mm-hmm.

Bunny: OK. I'm convinced!

Episode 20

The Pre-Historic Patrick Star Show [1.20b]

Cave Patrick: Me Patrick CaveStar! And me live with cave parents! [grabs onto the loincloth but tears it, Cave Cecil is seen fishing in a tar pit.] This me cave dad!

[Cave Cecil fishes out a primitive spider who licks him. Then Cave Patrick comes through the floor of the kitchen, where Cave Bunny is looking in the fridge.]

Cave Patrick: This me cave mom!

Cave Bunny: Hi! [beats a primitive creature and puts it on a plate as she smiles to the camera and Cave Patrick falls through the ceiling of Cave Squidina's room]

Cave Patrick: This me cave sister! [Cave Squidina turns feral and screeches, before inking and floating away] She's shy.

[Cave GrandPat is seen happily driving on his primitive bug in circles.]

Cave Patrick: This me cave grandpa! [he runs to his cave room which is a stone-looking television screen through which his friends are jumping and making primitive noises] This me cave! And this...

[Cave Patrick's house that looks like a volcano spits them out in a tar pit nearby.]

Cave Patrick: This me cave show! [The entire family is crushed by a huge boulder. The title shows "The Cave Patrick Star Show"]

Note: This episode is focused on Cave Patrick Cave Star and His Family

Episode 22

A Root Galoot [1.22b]

Patrick: [sniffs] Mmm. [laughs] What's that heavenly aroma?

[The tanning bed is completely closed, with heat coming out of it. Patrick looks in and gasps. Bunny, GrandPat, and Cecil do as well. Shmandrake's body is cooked.]

Bunny: [horrified] WE BARBECUED HIM!

Patrick: [picks up Shmandrake's body] There goes all our wishes! [cries]

Cecil: [pats Patrick's shoulders] There, there, son. Hey, maybe we've learned a valuable lesson here.

[Patrick and Cecil sniff Shmandrake's aroma.]

Cecil: Say, that does smell delicious. [The family start sniffing Shmandrake's aroma.]

Star family: Mmm...

GrandPat: [takes out fork and knife] Let's eat it! [A fork transitions to Shmandrake's body on a plate. The Stars pick pieces from it with forks, leaving only the head. They all eat his body.]

Cecil: Mmm, kind of nice having him feed us for a change, ha ha.

Patrick: [takes Shmandrake's haed] It sure is! [Shmandrake's head suddenly regrows] Huh?

Shmandrake: [screams, grabs Patrick's shirt] You maniacs! You ate me! [screams and shakes him] Why? [runs away, crying] I can't believe they were so selfish! [cries, then bumps into Squidina and grunts]

Squidina: [holding shovel] End of the line, Shmandrake. Give me that wish, or you're going back... [points shovel at him] six feet under.

Shmandrake: [pleading] Whatever you want, kid!

Squidina: I wish we never found you in the first place.

Shmandrake: Ah. [laughs] Fiddle dee doo-- [spins and laughs] Fiddle dee done! [snaps fingers]

[A purple cloud of magic dust takes Squidina back to her operating a camera and recording Patrick's gardening segment. She looks around.]

Patrick: Wow, the floor is much softer out here, [shown next to a hole] and once we've dug our hole, [takes out small seed] we plant a little seed.

Squidina: Phew!

Patrick: [off-screen] Hey, look what I found!

Squidina: Huh?

Patrick: [holding a genie lamp] A genie's lamp!

Squidina: [groans] I wish this cartoon was over already!

[The genie lamp appears. A genie inside snaps its fingers and a magic cloud of dust transitions to black.]

Episode 23

Blorpsgiving [1.23b]

Note: This marks the first SpongeBob SquarePants related episode to be themed around thanksgiving

Episode 26

Patrick's Prison Pals [1.26b]

GrandPat: Hey, nice bathroom! I call the top bunk!